An Epiphany of Stillness
Finding Notes of Presence Among Bird Song, Books, and in Winter's Light
I am cozily ensconced in a leather loveseat, the furry head of a one-hundred-pound Labrador Retriever weighted upon my left leg, heating my side. The world outside my window holds its own stillness—the Kenai River flowing aquamarine blue, the winter sky overcast, while eagles chirp and ravens croak in communication. A squirrel chatters in the branch a few feet beyond the window, its voice adding to the wild symphony of this place.
My somewhat temporary housemate responded to my SOS text for a mug of strong pour-over coffee with a dash or three of ½ and ½, because I really don't. want. to. move. A deliberate stillness connects me to this Twelfth Day of Christmas, Epiphany, with nature offering its own gifts of presence.
Today, on National Bird Day in the United States, Terry Tempest Williams' "When Women Were Birds" called to me from the bookshelf. As I savor a mug of coffee in my newly rearranged writing corner, these words resonate with particular clarity:
"We live among a gratitude of birds.
Each bird may sing differently from time to time.
Each species may sing differently from place to place.
A song may be repetition; or it may be random and unpredictable.
The more highly developed the song, the greater the range of variation" (65).
Today’s convergence is meaningful—it’s National Bird Day in the United States, Epiphany, winter's pausing along the Kenai River. Each brings its own song, its own way of marking time and place. Like the varied calls of eagles and ravens outside my window, and the song within each of us, every moment involves its distinct voice, unique offering.
Later I may regret the second pour-over coffee delivered at noon, knowing tomorrow begins a 14-day seasonal cleanse with Shannon Nering and GloKauai. No caffeine in this future, and today I embrace a small rebellion against my usual one-cup limit.
The glacier-fed Kenai River flows on, steady and ancient, while birds weave their song in the low angled winter light. Their voices speak to the heart of what Williams pens—the unpredictability of song, the way it shifts with time and place, and range in variations.
In the Dena'ina Athabascan language, K'T'U' - "Winged One" - captures this essence of flight and freedom, of voice taking wing. My dear friend Bunny Swan Gease* taught me this word, gifting it as a nickname for me years ago, its meaning deepened by our shared appreciation for the winged ones who grace time and landscape.
Reflecting upon the gratitude of birds and song in time, place, and variation, I think too of voice and song—mine, yours, ours. I ponder the tune our life beats
of action and inaction
of invitation, resonance, frequency, reflection
of determination, desire, delight
of connection, withdrawal, permission, yes, no
of purpose, presence, pretense
And, most of all, of the simplicity at the center of everything—breath.
Mary Oliver's words join the chorus rippling in me from her poem When I am Among The Trees, reminding us to "walk slowly, and bow often," to hear the trees when they whisper, "Stay awhile." Delight flows from their branches and the birds who perch and rest observing the world around them, and from every voice raised in its own true song and truth.
My 2025 wish and hope is that we may each open the present with gratitude, stay curious, and consciously acknowledge and delight in our variations. We are each blessed and blessing.
Like birds, may we sing our songs freely, allowing them to vary and evolve with time and place, understanding that in this variation is our strength, beauty, and presence.
Love, K'T'U' aka Pegge
For Reflection
Do you have a favored bird, or bird song?
Is there a bird whose absence you notice in your current landscape?
What word or tune does your heart long to sing into the world this year?
How can gratitude flutter more distinctly throughout your days and nights?
Kindly share your thoughts and comments—I’d love to hear from you and connect here!
A Tip: Add the “Merlin Bird ID” app to your smartphone to explore and learn the birds and their songs living or passing through your geography and landscape.
Ah, so you're one of the Bird People too! I thought so. . .
Pegge, Your photographs are breathtaking. I love all the birds. :) Favorites: Roseate spoonbill, frigate bird, all the owls, hawks, cranes, motmot and quetzal. There is a bird who sings here at night in Texas with a kind of whorling gurgle. I don't know what it is, but I love that sound. And owls hooting is so sacred.
I miss the motmots and the flock of parrots that landed in our tree every morning in Costa Rica.
TRUST
Gratitude fluttering. I love this. I am practicing slowing down in each hour as I work and taking more breaks. Gratitude is pretty present for me in things I love (animals, nature, clouds) but the challenge is feeling gratitude when things seem to not be going my way.
Thank you for asking and for the beautiful post! xo